And to commemorate, my RE sent me a bill! Haha. It wasn't a terrible bill. It was just about $175, but goodness gracious. If you ever want to know what it feels like to flush money down the toilet, just be a woman with POF and see an RE. Now, this is not a knock on REs, at all... I actually like my RE and plan to return once I hear back from NIH on whether I was chosen for the study this fall. However, waiting for something to happen is seriously like watching grass grow. I have never been on such a hormonal roller coaster in my life - and I mean that literally.
So, how did I mark the day? Well, for one, I forgot all about it until just about 5 minutes ago. How's that for ceremonial?
I started an old/new job! So, it was pretty low-key and uneventful.
And then, of course, there was the bill.
What have I done in the past 6 months? I smacked against a brick wall when I got the diagnosis and felt like my world was caving in... then I proceeded to go through grief stages in an insane way, mostly toggling between denial and bargaining. I've stopped buying baby clothes - I had an INSANE addiction. I've told some people... and by some I mean no more than 10. And, I've decided that since life isn't going to stop, I'm going to go on. That's the way it happens sometimes. I'm definitely not as far as I expect to go with this POF diagnosis, but I'm definitely not where I was 6 months (and one day) ago... and that's a good thing!
POF bites a big one! I'm rooting for you to get that BFP! Sounds like you're trying to look on the bright side, which is something I could be better at!
ReplyDeleteJen, thanks so much! I'm keeping everything crossed for a BFP and trying to live in the mean-time!
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