Lilypie Pregnancy Event tickers

Lilypie Pregnancy tickers

Monday, February 27, 2012

The Cracked Egg

Well, the eggie from the retrieval yesterday didn't make it! DH didn't believe me because I was laughing when I told him. He said he was waiting for me to say "just kidding". I wasn't laughing because I think it's funny. I just think this is going to be an interesting journey and maybe the laugh was more of a nervous laugh than anything.
Either way, back to the drawing board. I am taking OCP every other day (starting today) and I'll go back to the RE on Monday, Mar 12th.
Stay tuned.

Introduction

Hello blogland. My name is Nik. My goal with this blog is to share my POF journey and empower women while I'm at it. POF is premature ovarian failure. I'll get into that more at a later date.
In order to understand my story, we have to rewind to August 2009. At my annual exam, my GYN diagnosed me with PCOS - polycystic ovary syndrome. He offered that as an explanation for why my cycle was absent for the majority of the year. After doing some initial research, I decided it probably wouldn't be the end of the world. He handed me provera, to bring on a cycle, clomid, to induce ovulation and metformin, to control glucose levels (but it's used off-label to treat PCOS symptoms).
I'm not sure why, but I didn't buy it. I wanted to look at holistic ways of getting my cycle back. And I did... I started to work out, eat much better and get more sleep. I got an additional cycle, but nothing to write home about.
In 2011, I got married. After 2 wonderful weeks on a Hawaiian honeymoon, I came back to a battery of doctor appointments. First up was my GP. The appointment was pretty routine, but when I went for my follow-up, I was told I had a vitamin D deficiency! I couldn't believe it. After 2 weeks in Hawaii, I STILL had a vitamin D deficiency. So, after 4 weeks of 50,000 iU vitamin D per week, my cycle returned. That convinced me more than ever that there was something chemically imbalanced. That is when I decided to see a reproductive endocrinologist (RE).
At the same time, I joined a message board for women with PCOS. My RE ran a battery of tests, put me on provera, ran more tests. My cycles were always annovulatory. I took clomid for a cycle, nothing!
In December, I went back to my RE for more provera because my cycle hadn't returned after the Nov cycle (during which I took provera). After taking the Dec pills, my cycle didn't come.
Another visit to my RE revealed the most devastating news of my TTC journey. I had an elevated FSH level. I went back two days later to have my FSH rechecked and it came back at 85!
I asked the RE what the course of treatment would be for TTC and he said "donor eggs. You're done."
I have never been so crushed in my life. What followed was pretty similar to what happened when my dad died. I only wanted to stay in bed, with the curtains drawn, and be alone. I was mourning the loss of my fertility.
I went to GNC and bought menopause pills. When I got home, I took the first pill. The warning said not to operate machinery or vehicles while on the pills. It all felt so wrong. I was NOT ready to give up. I still want a biological child with my husband. I'm going to try my hardest to make it a reality.
Once I got over the initial shock, I made an appointment at an FSH-friendly clinic in NYC. On the day of my first appointment, the doctor I was to meet was on Dr. Oz! Talking about women with fertility issues! That was my sign.
In our initial meeting, they did bloodwork and explained different courses of action for POF. The doctor decided to put me on oral contraceptives (OCP). My FSH went from 85 to 47 to 27 to 10 to 6!!!! And then something miraculous happened - a follicle started to grow!
That brings me to the present. I had the first egg retrieval procedure yesterday and they are going to attempt to fertilize the egg today. I am currently in my waiting period to see if the egg fertilizes. If it does, we will attempt to grow some more eggs and eventually do IVF.
So, there's the story. I will keep you posted ever step along the way. This is my journey to the BFP I KNOW I am going to get....
Thank you for reading!